My wife and I have decided we don't want children.

If anyone does, please just send us your address and we'll drop them off.

What do you call someone who refuses to fart in public?

What do you call a country where everyone drives a red car?

More Dirty Dad Jokes

What's the difference between a tire and 365 used condoms?

One's a Goodyear. The other's a great year.

What did the toaster say to the slice of bread?

I want you inside me.

What goes in hard and dry and comes out soft and wet?

Chewing gum.